Find your Creativity

Last weekend my girlfriend and I took a kids-free trip to Colorado, for the stated purpose of just getting away and doing something out of the ordinary. I have to say that we were wildly successful in this endeavor -we tried skiing for the first time (loved it), we snowmobiled for the first time (loooooved it), saw amazing sights, and visited some of our great national parks (Garden of the Gods -OMG). We also went tubing on a steep and fast slope with two other couples, we ate good food, and had good fellowship. It was exhausting and relaxing, and had the side benefit of making me a more relaxed and creative team member when I got back on the job. And speaking of creative...

One unexpected outcome of the trip was a rekindled desire to harness my creative energies. In hindsight, this should not have been surprising, because I met a friend of mine for dinner one night in Denver, and I should have known he would rub off on me in some way (he always has).

I met Alan Brooks on 12/31/1990, at a New Year's Eve house party in Atlanta, GA. Alan was a member of a Christian rap group called Hosanna Hype, and I was producing hip hop beats and dabbling into rap myself, which many young men were doing at the time. This proved to be a fortuitous meeting. We needed each other. Hosanna Hype had no producer, and so they would rap over instrumentals of other artists, which I think limits you from developing your own identity. I had been making beats on the Roland TR-505 drum machine my father had gotten me for my 15th birthday for years, and recently had starting laying simple melodies and bass lines down with a Yamaha PSR-500 keyboard I bought in my freshman year of college. I liked to rap, too -used to write rhymes in high school and college. I have fond memories of me and my best friend from college, Troy, rapping in the Down Under to enthusiastic crowds of slackers avoiding getting to their classes. But I hated the sound of my voice. If anyone recorded me, when I heard myself on playback, I'd be mortified. So I was starting to want to write music for others and leave the microphone alone. Turns out, they liked my music, and I liked their rapping. I joined Hosanna Hype.

We recorded several songs together, performed live and became friends. Then life intervened. I became a father and husband, joined the Navy. He went of the school, started doing his thing. We went our separate ways but stayed in touch. Over the years he has continued to record and perform, and has also branched out into writing and hosting a podcast. He actually started his own comic book, called The Burning Metronome. I'm proud of him and amazed at his continued nurturing of his gifts. This is in stark contrast to me, as I will go through spurts of creativity, but often months and months of it being dormant. So when we all sat down to dinner, and caught up, and he regaled my girlfriend of stories of us when we were much younger, the seeds were being planted in me to dust myself off, see what jewels I had inside of me, and the oh so important last step: bring them forth and share them with the world!

Since I've been back, I've actually made an effort to practice my instruments, to write a little more, and to even inject more creativity into the code I write at work. It's liberating, it is refreshing, it makes me happy. Sometimes it makes other people happy. But we should express ourselves creatively even if no one likes our art but us. Creating things helps us feel more alive, but life often forces us to but those gifts away to do more practical things. Bills must be paid, and kids must be clothed and fed, but surely there is time to plant a garden, or to learn (or re-learn) that instrument, or to draw or doodle or paint, or to craft. Surely there is space for that. And if not, let us carve out such a space. Your soul will be blessed.


I thank my friend for unapologetically living a creative life, and inspiring me to do a little more of that myself. May that inspiration pass to you as well, and may you pass it on to others.

So Far, So Good

Two weeks into 2017 and I am doing pretty well about keeping my resolutions. Spoiler alert: this post will be a little personal.​

I'm 44 years old, with type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, and high cholesterol. In 2016, I was put on insulin by my PCP, who was alarmed at blood sugar levels that I had allowed myself to get used to. Thank God for Cigna's incentives to get health screens, and thank God for Cigna providing a team of nurses come to the downtown Chattanooga office to take away any excuses not to get this important task done. Thank God for the particular nurse that took my vitals, who was warm and kind and friendly and deft with the needles (hallelujah). When she saw my numbers, her eyes grew serious and sad. Small talk ceased. "I'm going to talk to you like you were my own son...", she began. "These numbers are bad. Bad bad. You have kids? You want to be around to see your grand kids? You want to be confined to a wheel chair because you had to have your feet amputated? GET THESE NUMBERS UNDER CONTROL!!!" I don't remember her name, but I thank God for the wake up call. After long stretches of avoiding doctor visits (because I knew the news was going to be bad), I found an excellent, engaging care provider (shout-out to Kathy Dodd, Nurse Practitioner) and started bringing my numbers down. Thank God for Kathy Dodd, since I am counting my blessings as I write.

So finishing out 2016, I had cut back drastically on meat, eggs and dairy consumption (the main sources of cholesterol), cut back on refined sugars (which by definition diabetics have difficulty getting out of our systems), and got off my butt and strove to be more active. I kind of went off the wagon a little during the holidays, but I think I have reached my mental tipping point. It is more natural to eat healthy than to eat the typical American diet. I don't think of it as a chore. I'm more mindful, I think is what I'm trying to say. And that's a good thing. With the holidays over and 2017 underway, I am focused on eating healthy and being active. Every now and then I will eat some meat or have a brownie, but I am miles away from where I was before my health screen. I hope others are sticking to their commitments and making good choices. We should encourage each other. We should give positive reinforcement to each other. If you stumble, just rise again and get back on track. Maybe we should set new month's resolutions instead of new year's resolutions. This can help us level set when we find ourselves falling short of our goals.

I will end with this: my 1/2/17 weight was 235.6. My weight today is 228.2. It is working. Slowly but surely. My goal is to see 199 on the scale this year. Yes, I'm putting it out there. So far, so good.

Continuous Improvement

Recently, I had the opportunity to lead a project that involves developing an internal website for the company. This is joy for me, a programmer now wearing the title of Project Manager Senior Specialist. I never want to get too far away from writing actual code - even if I become CEO, I will want Visual Studio installed on my machine. Programming is a passion of mine. However, I haven't done a web app in several years, and I am a bit rusty. Fortunately I have the hoarding tendencies of a packrat, and so I have kept IT books on several subjects at the ready, hoping, praying for such an occasion. I can hear them saying earnestly, from the end of the bench (bookshelf), "Put me in coach, I won't let you down!!"
So upon opening my copy of Programming Microsoft ASP.NET MVC I found the following quote, which I took as both a blessing and an admonition:

The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them. -Mark Twain

What a wonderful sentiment. And what a wonderful time to be alive, with so many wonderful books out there to consume and be influenced by. And since it is the new year, why not resolve to read some really good books? My goal is to read 42 books this year, up from 33 read last year. Even if you only read one, take advantage of the joys of literacy. Some people never read a book after finishing high school - to me, this is profoundly sad. Reading the right book(s) can change your life. And by changing your life, you may change your world.